Corey Shepherd

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  • Archer Vocabulary: aquiline

    Archer Vocabulary: aquiline

    archervocab


    I found that after writing the first “Archer Vocabulary” post, I not only quickly internalized the definition of “bailiwick,” I found myself trying to use it in sentences. So whether anyone else is reading this or not, it’s a potentially fantastic way for me to expand my word choice.

    Context

    Season 1 – Episode 8 “The Rock”
    After a botched job in San Marino, Mallory Archer finds herself on a video call with Len Trexler, head of ODIN, ISIS’s chief competitor in the world of espionage and security contracting. What starts as a verbal assault softens into a schoolgirl’s yearning as Mallory begins to list Len’s physical features.

    (more…)

  • The Auburn Creed as a classroom management tool

    Students in my classroom will learn the Auburn Creed (at the very least the first six lines) because I feel they are a very elegant way of stating otherwise common classroom rules. If a student doesn’t tell the truth, he will be reminded that without honesty, it is impossible to earn the respect of his classmates. If a student turns in sloppy or careless work, she will be reminded that only hard, diligent work will result in reward.

    I believe that this is a practical world and that I can count only on what I earn. Therefore, I believe in work, hard work.

    I believe in education, which gives me the knowledge to work wisely and trains my mind and my hands to work skillfully.

    I believe in honesty and truthfulness, without which I cannot win the respect and confidence of my fellow men.

    I believe in a sound mind, in a sound body and a spirit that is not afraid, and in clean sports that develop these qualities.

    I believe in obedience to law because it protects the rights of all.

    I believe in the human touch, which cultivates sympathy with my fellow men and mutual helpfulness and brings happiness for all.

    I believe in my Country, because it is a land of freedom and because it is my own home, and that I can best serve that country by “doing justly, loving mercy, and walking humbly with my God.”

    And because Auburn men and women believe in these things, I believe in Auburn and love it.

    -George Petrie (1945)

  • Archer Vocabulary: bailiwick

    Archer Vocabulary: bailiwick

    Archer Vocabulary

    If you enjoy edgy, animated comedies, I hope you’ve checked out Archer on FX. Intelligence agency ISIS boasts a motley crew of vain and arrogant secret agents and incompetent support staff that spoofs many popular espionage tropes in an anachronistic modern day New York City.

    Context

    Season 2 – Episode 6 “Tragical History” ISIS is facing a cyber attack and all hands are on deck scrambling to find a solution. In an attempt to shut down the mainframe computer, the agents must disable a batter backup secured behind a door that is controlled by the virus-infested mainframe. Agent Sterling Archer, the sauve seducteur, has no help to offer his fellow field agent, Lana Kane, and is sipping bourbon. ARCHER: Sorry. I have no idea how to open this thing. Not really my legerdemain. LANA: You mean “bailiwick”? ARCHER: I don’t know. Whatever. The scene winds down as Archer opens fire on the door’s lock sending ricocheting bullets in all directions.

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  • Chef Corey – Age 5-6

    Below are pictures of my first steps to becoming the impeccable bon vivant I am today. I plan to make each of these, thoroughly photo-documented along the way of course.

  • A Letter to the Editor re: Peavine Road

    A Letter to the Editor re: Peavine Road

    busybody-1I would like to voice strong opposition to the efforts to designate the Peavine Road section of TN-101 as a scenic parkway. The primary motivation behind this movement seems to be a desire to place restrictions on the amount and kinds of outdoor advertising allowed which will supposedly reduce distracted driving and protect property values. What such a designation would actually do is undermine important free market principles by barring private citizens from earning money on their own property.

    Residents of Fairfield Glade have voluntarily chosen to live in a community that imposes strict covenants on property owners. Those living along Peavine Road have no similar restrictions on the use of their land, and in a tough economy, some have chosen to supplement their income by allowing advertising on their property. The agreements between property owners and those they choose to do business with should not be subject to subversion by outside parties.

    One can be dissatisfied with the amount of outdoor advertising they see along Peavine Road, but an appropriate response to that is not to pursue measures that would restrict property owners’ rights without compensation. In fact, I maintain that drivers should be focusing on their immediate surroundings on the road instead of fixating on advertisements or otherwise taking in the natural scenic beauty that apparently exists just behind every billboard.

    There are many locations in Cumberland County where one can enjoy nature and its beauty including the Cumberland Mountain State Park, the Catoosa Wildlife Management Area, as well as the views supplied by most roads that branch off of Peavine. The yards of private property owners need not be added to the list.

    “For we hear that there are some which walk among you disorderly, working not at all, but are busybodies.” – 2 Thessalonians 3:11 KJV

    Corey Shepherd

  • Corn Days 1989 or “I Changed One Clown’s Life Forever”

    Know of any children who are scared of clowns? How about clowns that are scared of children?

    October 14, 1989. Main Street in Carmi, Illinois is busy with excitement. The 2nd weekend in October marks the conclusion of Carmi’s annual fall festival, Corn Days. Throughout the week, there are livestock showings, talent shows, musical performances, carnival rides, and Friday night two lucky high schoolers will be named the Corn King and Queen. Saturday is the most fun though. Saturday begins with games and activities specifically for kids. The carnies run the rides all day. The big show, the parade, is what everyone looks forward to. For me that means watching all of the area marching bands showcasing their routines in front of the grandstand, giggling at the Shriners in their goofy little cars, and catching candy from the many cars and floats that will be part of the lineup. (more…)

  • My Literacy Philosophy

    This was written for my CUED 6340 class at Tech.

    The ability to fluently speak, read, write, and comprehend language is without question, the most important skill for academic success. Literacy undergirds not only every academic subject but most aspects of daily life, and one cannot be expected to fully succeed without the ability to interpret the information with which they are presented.

    Literacy can be shaped from the moment a child is aware of their surroundings. It is crucial then that children are exposed to visual and audio stimuli frequently. Unfortunately, what was once the reading of a book to a child has devolved into the playback of television programs. Actively-involved family members are a crucial fragment in the development of life’s most important skill.

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  • Did you know…?

    Did you know…?

    • Slugs are gastropod molluscs and are descended from snails. Over time, the necessity of the shell was reduced in some species to become either nonexistent, small and unnoticeable, or internal.
    • Slugs are vile creatures that will destroy a garden or other beautiful plants in your yard.
    • Slugs, though composed primarily of water, will not pop, no matter how long you hold a lighter to them.
    • The mucous slugs produce to protect their disgusting insides turns to the consistency of rubber cement when a flame is applied. Mass extermination of slugs with fire could produce the world’s next great adhesive. (100% organic!)
    • Salt does not immediately kill a slug but causes it to die in slow, torturing agony. This method should be used whenever salt is available. Keep small restaurant packets in your pocket for such occasions.
    • People who defend the disgustingness of slugs hate freedom, kittens, apple pie, and everything you hold sacred.
    • Slugs were invented by Satan as a way to add disgustingness to the planet Earth.
    • Destroy slugs whenever you see them. Animals that depend on slugs for food are not doing a good enough job and must be forced to expand their menu.
    • If you are an invertebrate biologist with a raging one for slugs, do not speak to me. Unfriend me.

  • Credit Card Accountability, Responsibility and Disclosure (CARD [cute, huh?]) Act

    I received a notice from Bank of America today in regards to changes to my account that will be going into effect in February of the coming year as a result of recent cutely-named and intentionally-backronymed legislation. I didn’t follow this piece of legislation as it went through Congress, but from the lay wording in this letter, I am disgusted by how our government is supporting the poor personal financial habits of American consumers.

    Everybody would like some relief. Sure. It’d be great, but one shouldn’t depend on it.

    Here are some of the tenets of the CARD Act as quoted from my letter from Bank of America that I am disgusted with.

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  • Meeting Howie Mandel for a Late Dinner

    Meeting Howie Mandel for a Late Dinner

    Photo: elle.com
    Photo: elle.com

    It was 10:30pm Pacific time.

    I had one new voicemail. I knew why. The wireless service near my family’s restaurant was terrible. I stepped outside to get enough bars to find out what couldn’t wait until morning.

    “Corey, this is Howie Mandel. I was so impressed to hear about your last performance that I wanted to invite you to dinner with me this evening in San Francisco at La Paz.”

    With my jaw still partially dropped, I went back inside to deliver the news to my dad. He was sitting on a stool near the front counter, and he could tell I was awestruck.

    Before he could even ask what had me in such a daze, I blurted out, “Howie Mandel just invited me to dinner at La Paz!”

    “Tonight?” my dad replied, not reciprocating my excitement as I had anticipated. “It’s a little late for dinner.” (more…)